10 Ways to Enhance the Romance… With Yourself! (See article below)
In the hustle and bustle of today’s world we live in, with our Blackberries and I-Phones going off 24/7, emails flooding through, people stealing our attention and overload of information, Internet distractions, and celebrity gossip, we can get lost in all the mayhem of our lives, and as a result, lose touch with ourselves. But when you lose touch with yourself, you lose touch with your energy, and the very essence of you, the very thing that makes you attractive to other people, to the opposite sex, and to the things that you WANT in your life. You lose your personal magnetism.
You must keep that flame within YOURSELF hot and burning, always; you need to maintain your connection with yourself. You may think that the most important thing in this world is your connection with other people, and with your partner or the opposite sex, but let me tell you, in order to have that strong and beautiful connection with another… You first MUST have that strong, healthy and beautiful connection with your SELF. That comes first and foremost. And, you should know that those people with the highest level of self-awareness and self-love, are also the ones who are most successful with attracting the opposite sex and have the best, more amazing and lasting romantic relationships.
So, you NEED to make it a priority to take time out of your busy life and CONNECT with yourself. Make IT A HIGH priority. I promise you, doing this regularly and consistently you will see a dramatic improvement in the overall quality of your life and level of happiness, a lift in your confidence, and your love life will begin to thrive.
10 Ways to Enhance the Romance… With Yourself!
- 1. Make a nightly date with yourself. Yes, make a “date” with yourself, on either a nightly, or a minimum of a weekly, basis; schedule it into your planner, and honor it every time, treating it like you would a date with another person. And don’t flake on yourself! This is a priority. You will see the cumulative affect over time.
- 2. Turn OFF the TV & Turn off your phone or put it on silent – Treat it just like a real date! Think about how much time you eat up during the day – while driving in your car, while walking to someplace, or in line waiting for something, etc. – and talking on your phone to someone. Your inner self is screaming for some alone time, yet you’re always preoccupied with other people and things, and eating any potential alone time by gabbing away on your cell or answering emails. So when it’s your date with yourself, give yourself the respect it deserves and turn off all distractions, so you can really be present and focus on yourself. This may take some getting used to for you busy-bees and workaholics, but avoid the temptations to turn on distractions and simply be alone with yourself and your thoughts. You will come to enjoy it and this alone time will give you some much-needed clarity and focus.
- 3. Slip on something sexy & intimate. Put on something that feels good. Whether it be lingerie, or a silk slip or a cozy bathrobe. The more pleasing it is on the skin and the eyes, the better for your mood. When you put on something that makes you feel good and feel sexy, even when you’re by yourself, you will feel a shift in your mood and you will feel more beautiful, more powerful and more confident from the inside out.
- 4. Set the Mood – Yes, just like you would (or should!) a date with the opposite sex, it’s important to also set the mood for being with yourself. It will help you to quiet down and relax, and connect with your intimate, spiritual self. Some great ways that I recommend setting the mood are the following:
- Light candles – Put some scented votive candles around your room (I have a bunch that I spread out on my windowsill, dressers, and nightstand).
- Music! Put on a favorite song or music mix. I usually alternate between softer meditation music or light trance/European house music, depending on my mood or the mood I want to get in. I really like Karunesh.
- Choose a favorite fragrance, scented candle and/or incense. Use the same fragrance for every date. Let this be your signature fragrance and the signal to your mind that this fragrance means it’s “Me” time, and it’s time to reconnect with yourself. Some great fragrances I recommend are Lavender or Vanilla, which are known for their relaxation abilities and smell delicious too.
- 5. Pamper yourself: Soak in a stimulating Bath – Draw yourself a beautiful hot bath. And just allow yourself to actually relax in it and literally soak it up. Put your watch away. Put a candle or two by the bathtub and have the music on. For an extra stimulating bath, I also recommend getting fizzy scented bath salts, oils or “bath bombs.” Putting these in your bath will make for an even more decadent experience! (Recommendation: Try one of these delicious & invigorating Bath Bombs, from Lux Naturals, my favorite place for all things bath and body – http://www.luxnaturals.com/bath-and-body.html Then after your bath, rub in one of their sumptuous home-made body butter bars as it melts into your skin. Mmmmm…)
- 6. Read: Reading helps quiet your mind and relax you. While I recommend reading a self-improvement or personal growth book, a romance novel or some good poetry or magazine will be fine as well.
- 7. Treat Yourself… Indulge a little. Eat something appealing to the senses, and if you can cook it, that’s all the better as cooking can be very therapeutic. But if you’re not into cooking, you can just get take-out. Either way, treat yourself to something that makes you happy to eat, and has a lot of flavor, like seafood pasta or sushi, frozen yogurt, vanilla ice cream, dark chocolate, chocolate-covered strawberries, or other fruit. The following are some recommendations of foods that actually physically make you feel better and happier and elevate your mood: eating fish especially such as sushi or salmon, will physically make you feel better:
- Deep-sea Fish, such as Salmon: Deep-sea fish contain ample amounts of Omega-3 Fatty acids, which have a plethora of health benefits and elevate your mood.
- Real Dark Chocolate (best to get is 75% or more pure dark chocolate, not the commercialized ‘dark’ chocolate). Dark chocolate helps release dopamine and endorphins in your brain, which are those natural feel-good chemicals and natural painkillers!
- A glass of Champagne or wine, preferably red wine. Red Wine is an especially rich source of Antioxidants and also releases dopamine. Woohoo.
- 8. Love yourself…Admire yourself…Make a list of at least 3 things you find sexy or beautiful about yourself. Write it down. Put it somewhere that you’ll see it like your dresser mirror. Compliment yourself!
- 9. Respect yourself… Make a list of at least 3 things that you respect yourself for, or that you are proud of yourself for doing in this past week. It’s good to be continuously impressed with your own self and in admiration of yourself. The more you respect yourself and take time to appreciate and admire yourself, the more good things will keep coming to you and the more successful you’ll be in life.
- 10. Tap into your Inner Creativity – Being near water, especially moving water, stimulates creativity and ideas to flow. This is why drawing a bath is important, or sitting next to an ocean or lake, or even simulating the effect by purchasing one of those small plug-in waterfalls that you can put in your room and turn on when it’s time. You can buy these for about $10 at many drug stores or Target. With that creativity and this inner peace that you’re generating on your date, use it. Take a pen and write something, write a song or write a poem or short story. Draw or paint something. Create something or design something. Here are some suggestions of things to do that will help stimulate your creativity and tap into your inner creativity and desires, and manifest them!
- Write out your Top 10 biggest goals for this year for you, in detail. Be specific and paint a descriptive picture of what the end-result of the goal will look and feel like to you.
- Create a Vision Board. Get out a large white board or piece of paper, and go through magazines, newspapers, or online, and cut out all those things that represent your goals and where you want to ne in a given area. For instance, cut out pictures of $100 bills, of a beach in Tahiti, a couple kissing, the car that you’re dreaming of, it. Paste them onto your Vision Board in a way that feels good and inspires you to attain them, then put the Vision Board somewhere where you can see. You can always keep coming back to it and add to it and modify it.
- Create positive affirmations for yourself, and say them out loud. It is a truth that what we tell ourselves, we believe. By creating healthy, positive affirmations and doing a regular daily practice of repeating them, any old dialogue you have that’s negative or unhealthy will wane in its power and will be replaced by a much stronger, confident, competent, dialogue that is receptive to attracting success! At least give it a try.
Alright…. Go have fun on your Date!